Well nobody taught me pavement etiquette…

(Pic: www.maccloop.blogspot.com)

What type of pavement user are you?

I believe I’m right in saying roads are the literal highway for cars (and sometimes bikes). So it would not be improper to say that pavements are a highway for people, no? Well I would say that they are, and so it makes me think… Pavements don’t have rules for pedestrians  so how do we know how to use them?

Now, hear me out, I’m not going mad. Honest! Just some people have some really annoying walking habits, that do rile me so. Firstly, pavement hoggers. When neither side is good enough, and only the middle will do. When I overtake you ON THE ROAD, risking my life from the onslaught of busy rush hour traffic, know I am cursing you in my head.

Secondly, the umbrella holder. I’m not suggest umbrellas are annoying. In fact, me (and my hair) are very appreciative of their uses. But when you cross a pavement hogger with an umbrella, the outcome is never, ever good. Neither me, or my umbrella fits past. So I endure your snail like pace until I can find a gap to overtake. And there’s always a danger of those metal bits poking an eye out. Another reason to hate rain.

But that’s not it. There are a whole abundance of annoyances I find from people who clearly were never taught in the proper use of pavements. I don’t suppose the maintenance of proper accordance of pavement etiquette is particular interesting to anybody, but I do hope that people agree with me…

Slow walkers. They’re another. With their unhurried and tardy pace, that only seems to happen when you’re in a rush to get to the office. (NB- Old people definitely fall under this category, but I can’t always be mad at them, as some genuinely can’t walk any faster. I have morals.)

The sudden stoppers. The typical sudden stopper will abruptly stop, without warning, when you’re right behind them, because they’ve forgotten whether or not they turned the grill off after that bacon this morning (or something like that). These people seriously lack the awareness of people surrounding them. I rarely apologise if I continue to walk into them as they stop.

The rusher. It’s understandable to be in a rush, I often am as my timekeeping leaves much to be desired. But you don’t need to be rude. A generic rusher will often have a hurried expression on their face, and less control over flailing arms, often holding briefcases or bags. Don’t be rude rushers, walking fast won’t allow you to walk through me.

Although not a pedestrian, drivers and puddles also worry me. One of my main concerns as a pedestrian in the rain is not umbrellas, but drivers splashing big puddles at me. This happened once, and the driver laughed. That’s a lesson I’ll never forget. Puddles on the road = bad news. I will walk another way, thank you very much.

So, if you’re a fellow pavement user, please be aware of those around you. This plea is so I may walk to work without being held up, splashed in puddle water or lose an eye, courtesy of your huge-ass golf umbrella. This is not fairway. It’s a pathway, now move it.

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